The events of the last few days have left many feeling wounded, flabbergasted, wondering, all those big words. Every time I watch news or photos from this Westgate attack I can’t help but feel bile in my stomach. Who does such heinous things? Who shoots children leave alone the helpless men and women? This stuff is meant to be in movies only! How did this become our reality, that a person opens a sniper at another human being, at children, mimes!
I am not naïve to that we have had many more tragedies, some which perhaps got many more killed, but perhaps the reason this hurts so much was the helplessness of it all. It felt like an outsider came and raped our country in broad day light and we were observers, almost helpless. I see newspapers today, of families burying their loved ones, of stories of people who were caught up in the menace and my heart breaks.
In the midst of this, I have had faith struggles as blogged earlier in the week the faith challenge.
Last night i found myself lost in thoughts of what is important. I found myself thinking of how fickle our lives really are. I love songs; somehow they get to how I feel. This song:
If I could have one desire
Before my life is through
Even in my darkest night
My light would shine for You
You are my saving grace
Anchor of my soul
In a world that’s turned upside down
I want You to know
You are my faithful friend
The One that I lean on
You always understand
With all that I am
I’ll give You the deepest devotion I know
With all my strength
I won’t let You go
As I look to You above
I will give You all my love
An upside down world
In a world that’s so upside down, my heartfelt desire is to live for God, my desire is for the moments when my light shines for Him. In these dark days, in these moments when I have so many questions, I give God my deepest devotion. Yester as I thought about the events of the last few days, I found myself asking God to fill me afresh, to order my days afresh, to allow me to live for Him yet again; because that’s my One Desire.
What is your desire? If the events of the last few days do nothing for you and me, I pray they just help us realize that we are passersby in this world. I pray that we realize that today we have the privilege to be alive. I pray we choose to live for what our hearts beat for. I tell you when that person walked into Java or Artcaffe or Nakumatt at Westgate, they had no clue they were on countdown of their last days. It makes these verses have a new meaning “teach us to number our days, that we may gain a heart of wisdom.”
Last weekend during a sermon in church, my pastor told a story of 2 people who had passed on. One had bought all the many big nice cars and as he was buried, the thing that the people could think to bring to the burial place to represent his life was these cars. However, there was this other guy, who all his life he had been about educating the needy children; he had sponsored so many through schools. At his burial, as they thought what represented this man lives, they called the children round his burial place. How I pray my life will be as that of this second person, that the thing I will always be known for is that my light shone for God in some dark places.
I ask again, how about you? What will your life represent? These thoughts have a way of making me take risks, to live for now, to take a road less traveled, see this blogpost .
I often am a passerby in this life, blazing along. Many times this thing called fear stops me from doing so many things. But in moments such as this, my heart burns to live for what is important. My heart burns to live for God, to be about the things that draw me nearer to Him than getting tied up in the fickle things that draw me away from Him.
I hope you dance
If I had more space to put up another song in my heart this morning, it would be ‘I hope you dance..May you never take one single breath for granted… I hope you still feel small when you stand beside the ocean, whenever one door closes I hope one more opens. Promise me that you’ll give faith a fighting chance, and when you get the choice to sit it out or dance… I hope you dance….i hope you dance..I hope you never fear those mountains in the distance, never settle for the path of least resistance; Livin’ might mean takin’ chances but they’re worth takin’...
I hope we chose to dance, to never let fear stop us from living this beautiful life.
That may mean that we start living out a dream that only you gets, that may mean we don’t postpone any further doing that thing that which makes us happy, that may mean going for a dancing class and probably goofing through the salsa dance, that may mean diving into those waters that have seemed scary for the longest time, that may mean spending time with that boy / girl you like, that may mean taking your family on holiday when all in you says be stingy. Whatever it is, live it today.
We are overcomers
But most of all, today I am convinced of this one thing, that we shall overcome. I have never been prouder to be Kenyan as I am this week. I have loved our spirit. So these terrorists might have set out to break our spirit, but this one thing they do not know, that we are OVERCOMERS. We may be down now, we may seem helpless now, but this one thing we know, we shall overcome. You need to know our God, He never loses. This one thing I know for sure, in my lifetime or the next, one way or another, the Lord shall vindicate us.
I came across this statement from telegraph, a top UK newspapers; “The details and pictures that will emerge from Nairobi in the next few days will be harrowing, but do not judge by appearances. Kenya’s story is one of resilience, not fragility. Kenya has recovered from al-Qaeda ravages in the past, they will do so again”.
Make no mistake, we shall walk tall again. PROUDLY KENYAN. NAJIVUNIA KUWA MKENYA.